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Sunday, May 16, 2010

my date night with a blogger

So, I end up running some errands all day Saturday, pocket the T$215 from the SCOOP satty, miss the HORSE tournament (which was probably good, because if I had a run like Grump I’d be on monkey tilt for weeks) get a haircut, and run another bar tourney where I end up second again (threehanded AJ can't hold v QJ allin pre, and AJ can't fade K5s on a AJx flop when the flush comes in - bleh) When I get home, I naturally decide to run the nightly $55s on Stars and FTP.

Stars tourney suckedsuckedsucked. I kept running into big hands and was done in an hour and change. FTP tourney was very amusing, mostly because I spent four hours and over 200 hands with twoblackaces as our table never freaking broke.

One, it was cool to play with him, but two, it got even better because of the table chat, when I got it in my head to start screwing with people.

It started after a hand where TBA open minraised and got three callers, including villain in the big blind,

Flop 887 with two diamonds, it checks around.
Turn 4c, villain donkbets pot, TBA calls.
River 6h, villain donks pot again, TBA tank calls with 65 for the turned straight.
Villain mucks Q8o and is NOT amused.

Villain then bones me a few hands later when he flats my AA preflop open with TT and spikes a QQT flop, and I double him up - and then the chat comes…

heffmike: i really hate this game
Gdempsey: I really hate ni@@ers
Gdempsey: like two black aces (obv reading too much into his avatar)
heffmike: good, you'll always be low class scum. congratulations.

Then I jam 55 into his UTG raise with KK for 11BB effective and spike a runner runner wheel to double through. So I decide to start fucking with the guy now that I’m freerolling. My whole goal was to amuse myself and keep provoking him to continue his dodo chat. I hate that I’m a dyslexic typist b/c one of my hands types faster than the other.

heffmike: prolly shouldn't drop n-bombs. FTP RNG has ears
Gdempsey: winning like a ni@@er suckout is one thing...so &&%% off biatch
Gdempsey: your mother has ears too...and I bust my nut all up in that
heffmike: you do know we all evolved from african monkeys, right? we all black sir.
Gdempsey: fa@@ot ni@@a
heffmike: slurpslurp
Gdempsey: I'm not biatch...
Gdempsey: there's a difference btwn black and ni@@er dumba@@
heffmike: you are not really gay if you only are a top and not a bottom. so I see your point.
heffmike: you are pretty smart afterall
heffmike: tell me more.

Gdempsey: you're right...now you're thinking biatch
Gdempsey: being suckout freeloading ni@@er is different than being someone that contributes to society
Gdempsey: biatch
heffmike: oh, I see, he spiked when you slowplayed like a chump and now you are angry.
heffmike: I'm sorry about that
Gdempsey: nah...just pointing out a suckout ni@@er when I see one
heffmike: ok. now you will probably not win another pot.
heffmike: since he just got there (TBA just bet the river in a pot we all were in with like two UNO cards or something)
heffmike: lol
Gdempsey: wtf are you talking about?
Gdempsey: go smoke some more of whatever your smoking you smelly ni@@er

So I change the game because Asian epithets are more amusing. TBH, he rolled with it pretty well.

heffmike: actually, I'm a lirre asian man, so give me your best jap jokes sir.
heffmike: let's see if you have any game there.
Gdempsey: I live in Japan...you slant eye nip
heffmike: wonderful. I'm sure you are a beloved character there.
heffmike: the japanese LOVE outsiders.
Gdempsey: yep...pretty much b/c we run the country since we f'd em up after they tried to act tough
Gdempsey: so fluck you and your dirty no soul havin asian ethnicity
heffmike: we aren't horses or sharks, we have souls. full of rice and karate, but souls nonetheless.
Gdempsey: nope...you're all biatch a@@ slant eyed nips
heffmike: NIps? likethe cracker? they are quite tasty, better than cheez its.
heffmike: some japs probably invented it.
Gdempsey: probably...they are robots with no souls
Gdempsey: and nothing better to do
heffmike: providing tasty treats, cars, and cartoons are good enough, aren't they

But finally the fun is over…

Gdempsey: i've been warned for my chat...so you tattle tails can relax
Gdempsey: lol
Gdempsey: dumba@@es
heffmike: hahaha.
heffmike: wasn't me, I was enjoying you too much
Gdempsey: don't enjoy me...mr take it in the deuce
Gdempsey: lol
Gdempsey: I'm not comfortable with that
heffmike: I only let my wife do that.

.. and now I actually have to play pokah with one last fun moment just before the third break.

Blinds 120/240/25. Some momo open limps in EP, I make it 1125 in the hijack with a T4500 stack, villain jams for 2800.behind me

heffmike: i guess I need to make a bad call and get there.
Gdempsey shows [9c 9h]
heffmike shows [Kh Js]
*** FLOP *** [6h 4d Ah]
*** TURN *** [6h 4d Ah] [Jh]
*** RIVER *** [6h 4d Ah Jh] [6s]
Gdempsey shows two pair, Nines and Sixes
heffmike shows two pair, Jacks and Sixes
heffmike wins the pot (6,435) with two pair, Jacks and Sixes
heffmike: gg
Gdempsey (Observer): wow...gg, terrible call. hiroshima...remember it biatch.
heffmike: ladies and gentlemen, gdempsey! reloading at an online payment processor near you!
heffmike: don't forget to tip him, he really does need it. GL sir.

At some point during that hour TBA made a really bad hero call when he led the river, got jammed into by runner-runner trips, and called with top pair. So he was down to 4BB when this happened.

twoblackaces raises to 625, and is all in
heffmike raises to 1,200
heffmike shows [Th Ad]
twoblackaces shows [Ac 4s]
heffmike: gl
*** FLOP *** [Kd 7d 2d]
*** TURN *** [Kd 7d 2d] [4h]
*** RIVER *** [Kd 7d 2d 4h] [Ah]

Hard to hit a flop any harder than that on my end and not hold. Two outs FTW.

We both basically stay out of each other’s way for the most part as we get to and through the money bubble – and then I get silly when he opens 3x from the cutoff at 400/800/100 with a 19K stack – and I resteal shove with a 17K stack and A4o…. and he snaps with AKs, flop runs out QK7AJ anyway and I’m toast in 124th for a min, min cash. Soon after that, he wins another big pot with a rivered flush vs. a flopped set and has a top 5 stack. FML.

I will say this: TBA’s got a very solid MTT game. He doesn’t get out of line very much, and when he does, he picks his spots very well. I’ve never seen someone be able to get stacks in the middle as a 70/30 favorite or better as much as he did (including my dumb ass)

I really botched up jamming in that spot as I don’t think he range is wide enough for the jam to be +EV. Obv he has a trivial call with AKs, but I don’t think I get him to dump enough rag aces and small pairs to make it worthwhile. Just a dumb move in a badly timed spot.

Maybe he sends me a piece later after he final tables this thing or something (he’s 6/26 as I write this) as I’m solely responsible for keeping him alive and gifting him a 40BB stack to work with post bubble.

All in all, it was the most fun I've had playing in a MTT in a longlong time. Wonderful stuff.

So, I can still play this game. As long as I’m not around a blogger.

That could present a problem over the next few weeks.

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